You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize