Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I have tasted many bathrooms
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize