my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
