Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
