help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Randomize
