I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
is it fun? or sober?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
