Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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