I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Rumble strips road head = magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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