Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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