Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
