I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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