You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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