god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
