I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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