My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
