yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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