so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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