but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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