we're blogging at a bar
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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