at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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