Walk of Shame. In a state park.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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