I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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