Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
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