i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
