youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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