Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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