I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
