you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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