So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
