If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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