dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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