it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
