please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
