why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
my sisters under your porch take her home
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
