I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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