I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
