It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
