i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize