wanna go halves on a baby?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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