Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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