i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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