So drunk, too bad you don't want this
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
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They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize