Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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