I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
He passed out mid-signature
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
