yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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