I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
