I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Randomize
