I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
