i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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