do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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