I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Randomize
