I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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